TELEVISION
About
Lust in space! Welcome aboard the starship Jupiter 42 and its motley crew of misfits.
Related Subjects
Episodes
1 to 3 of 13
1. Cool Whip
22m
Captain's Log: Star date… star raisin… star plum… Freckin' star fruit! Where's my damn junkfood? Only a punkass, lowlife teenager with a perverted pepperoni fetish and his brain stuffed down his boxers could accidentally hack into my ship's flight controls and honestly believe he was just playing a "sweet new video game"... right up until he flew my ship into a planet. Coincidentally, that's exactly what my teenage nephew Whip just did. As my crew and I climbed out of the wreckage, a couple of local law enforcement goons were there to greet us. Apparently they had nothing better to do than blow holes through the heads of innocent accident victims, even though their planet had hit us just as much as we had hit it. When they saw Whip, though, they started pissing themselves with teenybopperish glee. They thought he was some kind of celebrity.
2. You Want to Put That Where?
22m
Captain's Log: As captain of a starship, being on-time is an important component of my professional image. That's why I was justifiably pissed off when a traffic jam made me miss a critical appointment at McHooter's with a client I'll call Mistress Shots O'Booze. As consolation, I stole some shwag from the frecked-up spaceship that caused the jam. Turned out I'd stolen ten thousand tubes of G-Y Jelly. For those of you who don't care what men do with other men behind closed doors, I'll just say it's an intimate masculine product.
3. Honey I Shrunk The Crew
22m
Captain's Log: Cruisin', bruisin', and losin' my temper a little more every freckin' minute. Christmas came early on the Jupiter 42 this year: I was charging up a storm, buying every sick freckin' porno I could find. When my crew started to whine that I was hogging all the goodies, I shared the wealth (generous guy that I am). T'Nuk, naturally, missed the point and bought a new bra big enough to hold her sagging blubber-bags. Fortunately, Whip showed a little imagination and ordered a shiny new shrink ray from the back of a comic book. Sadly, not everyone likes to share as much as I do.
4. Ghost Ship
22m
Captain's Log: Everyone knows the old "out of gas" trick - you fly your ship somewhere out into the void between a couple of galaxies, let the fusion drive sputter out, and tell your date the ship's out of fuel. Then you find creative ways to pass the time "until help arrives," or you decide your pelvis can't take anymore and you "remember" that there's a spare fuel pod in the cargo bay. Times like that, running out of gas can be a good thing. This was not one of those times.
5. Benito's Revenge
22m
Captain's Log: It's always such a tragedy when my ass-bouncing with Six is interrupted by petty trivialities. This time, my grandpa Benito broke out of the Fun City Retirement Home with a gang of antique cronies, then waylaid us with some wackjob story about the staff at Fun City sucking his brainwaves out against his will. Obviously, I can't be blamed for thinking that was a load of horse crap.
6. All For None
22m
Captain's Log: My crew's pulled some fart-brained stunts over the years, but this time it was S.B.D. - "Stupid But Deliberate." Six, Gus, T'Nuk, and Whip actually walked out on me, quit, mutinied! They were blathering about how they couldn't stand the "working conditions" aboard the Jupiter 42! They're all freckin' crazy. Sure, there was the screwup with the dental plan, and that minor incident with the radiation leakage, but that's nothing to leave a job over. Especially when the boss is as cool and proactively employee-focused as me.
Extended Details
- SeriesTripping The Rift
- Closed CaptionsNo