Just Make a Choice!

Why Do All the Nice Girls End Up Getting Kidnapped and Held for Ransom? In this book, YOU, the reader, are a thirtysomething part-time actor/full-time waiter suddenly caught up in a kidnapping. Julia, the girl you went out with last night, has been TAKEN HOSTAGE. What will you do? Will you go to the police and ask for help? Will you burst into the hideout, killing everyone in sight, then tell Julia that she shouldn't misinterpret this as some sort of big commitment? Or, will you unplug your phone and just get really, really drunk? The choice is yours!

JUST WHO DO YOU HAVE TO KILL TO GET HEALTH CARE AROUND HERE? In this book, you, the reader, get to be the main character in an exciting tale of blackmail and corporate espionage. You're an alcoholic temp with a dream of one day being a celebrated novelist. Unfortunately, you drink too much. When you wake up from a blackout, you discover you've been framed for murder. Someone wants you to take a permanent job, and he's ready to blackmail you into doing it. What will you do? Will you turn yourself over to the cops and write a memoir about being wrongly imprisoned? Will you go perm and enjoy the benefits of health care? Or will you escape into the sewers and live with the Mole People? The choice is yours!