I Don't Want to Be the Hero

Beat the Demon Lord and save the world? No thanks! People always said demons and dragons were horrifying monsters. They didn't warn me they were gorgeous, too. My name is Mal, and ever since I was a boy, I've been treated as a malcontent because of my ability to see magic. For everyone else, magic is proof of the Goddess' love. To me, it is just a colorful spread of enchantments, cantrips, blessings, and hexes. And any spell I can see, I can break. I had always expected to grow up to be a ditch-digger. Instead, I was dubbed a hero. Heroes are sent out in the wasteland, to slay monsters and to challenge the Demon Lord. It's a suicide mission. But once I was exiled, I found that the outside world was drastically different from what I had thought. The beautiful women I meet, demons, dragons, and orcs, might be my best shot for surviving the insanity I've been thrown into. Warning: This novel is not appropriate for all ages; it contains descriptions of violence, unconventional relationships, and limitless adventure.

Defeat the Bitch Goddess. Rescue my sweetheart. Marry my lovers. Lilith, Empress of Demons, has charged me with defeating the Bitch Goddess's remaining generals. My quest will take me beyond the burning sands of the Endless Dunes to the frozen, cursed reaches of the Coldspite Basin. With my lovers by my side–the innocent orcish maiden, the insatiable dragonkin, and the rough and tumble goblin–nothing will get in my way. I will save my sweetheart and destroy the Bitch Goddess before she brings about the end of the world. Warning: This novel is not appropriate for all ages; it contains descriptions of violence, unconventional relationships, and limitless adventure.

So I might be pretty good at this hero business after all. My name is Mal. Growing up in The City, I had been taught that a benevolent goddess protected us from the Demon Lord and his legion of horrors. But upon my exile, I learned the world was far larger and more wonderful than I could have ever imagined. Now I'm a squire to Annowan, demon knight and heir to the Throne. I'm also married to an elf, and I have three more weddings waiting for me when I return to Babylon; Gilly the dragonkin, Thalie the orc, and Krencha the goblin are all eager to join my family and announce our intentions to topple The City to the entire empire. But a new mission sends us to Dragon Port, Gilly's hometown, a city ruled by greed and cutthroat politics. We need to access Velka's Library, which belonged to Annowan's long-lost mother and find clues on the Bitch Goddess's remaining two generals and the dwarven king Reverkar. I'll need all my wits and skills to survive the library's cursed and twisting corridors. But with my wonderful wives by my side, I'm sure we'll succeed. This book is intended for mature listeners due to descriptions of violence and unconventional relationships.