Dreadful Boys

Phoenix: Bad breakups happen. Sometimes, they hurt, and other times they're downright deadly. I spent the last year trying to keep my head above wave after wave of heartache. I focused on my band, my friends, and my cat. I wasn't living, but I was surviving without Eli. That all changed because he's back. And he's with someone else. As if seeing him with another person wasn't bad enough, he hasn't changed. He's still the same addict I fell in love with. I don't know if I can forgive him for it, either. But the heart wants what it wants, and I don't think mine will ever stop begging for his. Eli: I had no business inserting myself in Phoenix's path again. We were a catastrophe before, so what made me think it'd be different this time? I made it my mission to ensure that I broke him so thoroughly that he'd never want me again. But that's the thing, I can't seem to forget him. He's a living memory beneath my skin. His kisses are burned into my soul. The screams in my skull are only quiet when he's near. But the noise is louder than ever before, and I fear he might be unable to silence them this time. We're doomed, but I can't stay away. Not anymore. Contains mature themes.

I never meant to keep this secret for so long. I also never meant for this secret to twist and bend into something . . . more. Suffering from an insatiable hero complex has been a real issue, which might explain my need to keep Oli close. It might explain why I wanted nothing more than to help him. What it doesn't explain is my attraction, which grows more with every day that passes. Being his friend has made me question everything about myself whilst simultaneously opening my eyes to the beautiful heart he hides behind layers of impenetrable armor. I should put a stop to it all. I should come clean. Every moment we spend together puts my band and friendships at risk. That's what happens when you walk hand in hand with a strange lad . . . You never want to let go. Contains mature themes.