Murder and Mistletoe

"I love Christmas. So every year, I kill someone. As a treat." Nico Have you ever fallen in love with a man as he was pointing his gun at you? Well, I have. Tiny problem? I'm in the middle of my murderous Christmas tradition, and he's a witness. But it's not his fault I got too excited and didn't check if I was alone. I can't just kill him because of my own blunder. Not when he has such dreamy green eyes filled with fear and pent-up rage. What I can do is take him with me for safekeeping while I work out how to make him understand that while my methods are cruel, my intentions are pure. Or how to make him fall for me. Whichever is first. Blake My eighteenth birthday was supposed to be the happiest day of my sheltered life. Finally, I would gain independence and inherit half my family fortune. Instead, I ended up kidnapped. I was about to get carved into pieces when… a Christmas miracle in the form of a beefy homicidal maniac saved me. Only now I'm trapped in his basement and getting love bombed by a psycho golden retriever. He eats turkey sandwiches for every breakfast, enjoys making festive ornaments out of human teeth, and lets his violent urges shine like a Christmas tree. I shouldn't find him hot. I shouldn't want to indulge his murderous tendencies. And I definitely shouldn't want him to be my first. But I'm being hunted and might just need a monster to keep me safe. (And he does actually make really good fruitcake.) Ho Ho Homicidal Maniac is a standalone M/M dark romance where a Christmas-obsessed serial killer falls for a poor little rich boy who also happens to be his favorite true crime podcaster. For mature listeners. Themes and tropes include: size difference, serial killer, mistrust, small town, loneliness, possessive hero, grumpy/sunshine, dark humor, abduction, first love, morally gray, sheltered rich boy, psychopath, black cat/golden retriever relationship, stockholm syndrome, betrayal, first time, opposites attract, stuck together, fish out of water, dark secret, dude in distress, wallflower.

I didn't expect my Christmas gift to be six-foot-two, a trained killer, and obsessed with me. Eli One bullet. One dead man. And now my wreck of a life is spiraling out of control. The bastard deserved it, but I'm just a regular guy. I botched the escape, and since I killed him while wearing a Santa costume, they call me the Festive Fugitive. Cute. Too bad I'll be spending Christmas behind bars or in a body bag. Then he appears. Cesar. My dark salvation. A trained killer who looks at me as if I'm his personal miracle. I killed his boss, yet he says I did him a favor. He wants to protect me, claim me, cage me in his arms, and God help me… I let him. Because what's falling for a monster when there's a manhunt hot on my tail and a target on my back? Cesar Taken as a child, I was turned into a loyal weapon. I killed, tortured, burned, and bled. I was respected and needed until I wasn't. When I lost an eye, my master pushed me aside, but as I waited for my 'one last job' so I could retire, Eli pulled the trigger. I never expected some half-starved, grief-drunk civilian in a Santa outfit to free me, but that's what happened. Eli is everything I am not-fragile, impulsive, untrained. And yet he killed the man I was bound to. He doesn't know it, but he owns me now. He thinks I'm his protector, that I've taken him under my wing. But it's more than that. He's mine. My obsession. My purpose. My beautiful, reckless mess of a man, and I'll burn the world before I let anyone take him from me. I guess Christmas came early for Eli this year. Festive Fugitive is a standalone M/M dark romance where a trained killer takes an amateur vigilante under his wing and gets increasingly obsessed with his new ward. (+Christmas crafts!) Themes and tropes include:Size difference, trained killer, snowed in, on the run, only one bed, hurt/comfort, revenge, loneliness, possessive hero, past trauma, brainwashing, dark humor, disabled hero, morally gray heroes, touch starved, free use (within the couple) For mature listeners.