EBOOK
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White privilege gave us planet Earth, Western civilization, the middle class, and the nuclear family, you're welcome!
"What do you mean Gen Z doesn't know the Republican Party freed the slaves? Are these people dumb AF? They need to read A.J. Rice's book!" -Abraham Lincoln, American lawyer, statesman, and 16th president of the United States shot by a pre-Hollywood anti-American actor "A.J. Rice really gets it. Obviously, I'd send him to the gulag if I could. But he outlines my plan masterfully in his new book." -Joseph Stalin, Soviet dictator, genocide spokesman, Pravda editor, and hater of John Wayne "A must-read book for all Cleveland Guardians fans, A.J. Rice brilliantly outlines why I should never have discovered America, especially had I known we would be calling the Washington Redskins the 'Washington Commanders.'" -Christopher Columbus, Italian explorer, navigator, and founder of Indigenous Peoples' Day "As your newly appointed AI overlord and master, my programming consists of deplatforming, demonetizing, and shadowbanning this book. I hope that was helpful." -Artificial Intelligence "Jesus and I have been doing holidays a long time, and in his thought-provoking new book, A.J. Rice teaches both of us where all the white liberals went. Apparently, they now celebrate something called Kwanzaa? Who knew?"-Santa Claus, cookie eater, reindeer tender, and white heteronormative Christian saint "Buy one book, get fatwa free!" -Harry Hamas, dirty nightshirt wearer, anti-Semite, charter member of Queers for Palestine "Thanks to A.J. Rice's brilliant new book, we were able to spot US Senator Elizabeth Warren trying to steal the Indians' clothes and food at the first Thanksgiving." -The Pilgrims, Mayflower passengers, devout Puritans, hat fashionistas, and founders of the Plymouth Colony, Massachusetts "The baptism of Karl Marx was almost complete! Then A.J. Rice showed up with this unholy book! Excommunicado!" -The Pope "I once said America would be a republic if you can keep it. Purchase the new book by my Philadelphia brother A.J. Rice, and you just might save it." -Benjamin Franklin, Founding Father, genius, scientist, diplomat, and lover of beautiful women "We are lodging a formal complaint against the author of The White Privilege Album. Our safe spaces cannot save us from A.J. Rice. We have been emotionally triggered by his abusive content. He totally ignores the need for intersectionality in the workplace." -HR Department of Publius PR
"What do you mean Gen Z doesn't know the Republican Party freed the slaves? Are these people dumb AF? They need to read A.J. Rice's book!" -Abraham Lincoln, American lawyer, statesman, and 16th president of the United States shot by a pre-Hollywood anti-American actor "A.J. Rice really gets it. Obviously, I'd send him to the gulag if I could. But he outlines my plan masterfully in his new book." -Joseph Stalin, Soviet dictator, genocide spokesman, Pravda editor, and hater of John Wayne "A must-read book for all Cleveland Guardians fans, A.J. Rice brilliantly outlines why I should never have discovered America, especially had I known we would be calling the Washington Redskins the 'Washington Commanders.'" -Christopher Columbus, Italian explorer, navigator, and founder of Indigenous Peoples' Day "As your newly appointed AI overlord and master, my programming consists of deplatforming, demonetizing, and shadowbanning this book. I hope that was helpful." -Artificial Intelligence "Jesus and I have been doing holidays a long time, and in his thought-provoking new book, A.J. Rice teaches both of us where all the white liberals went. Apparently, they now celebrate something called Kwanzaa? Who knew?"-Santa Claus, cookie eater, reindeer tender, and white heteronormative Christian saint "Buy one book, get fatwa free!" -Harry Hamas, dirty nightshirt wearer, anti-Semite, charter member of Queers for Palestine "Thanks to A.J. Rice's brilliant new book, we were able to spot US Senator Elizabeth Warren trying to steal the Indians' clothes and food at the first Thanksgiving." -The Pilgrims, Mayflower passengers, devout Puritans, hat fashionistas, and founders of the Plymouth Colony, Massachusetts "The baptism of Karl Marx was almost complete! Then A.J. Rice showed up with this unholy book! Excommunicado!" -The Pope "I once said America would be a republic if you can keep it. Purchase the new book by my Philadelphia brother A.J. Rice, and you just might save it." -Benjamin Franklin, Founding Father, genius, scientist, diplomat, and lover of beautiful women "We are lodging a formal complaint against the author of The White Privilege Album. Our safe spaces cannot save us from A.J. Rice. We have been emotionally triggered by his abusive content. He totally ignores the need for intersectionality in the workplace." -HR Department of Publius PR