Remodeling the Bachelor

I, Philippe Zabelle (wealthy software designer, callous playboy, totally un-handy man), do hereby hire contractor Janice Diane Wyatt to renovate my home (but not make significant changes in my life, like making me fall for her, a single mom).

I give J.D. full authority to choose appliances and decor-as long as she doesn't distract me from my poker games or wear anything too revealing....

Should J.D. fail to complete this job-or should I be unable to resist her beauty and intelligence-this agreement will be renegotiated according to our mutual desires.