Parents make enormous sacrifices helping children become healthy and autonomous adults. And when, children are older, popular wisdom advises parents to let go, disconnect, and bite their tongues. But, increasing life spans mean that parents and children can spend as many as five or six decades as adults together: actively parenting adult children is a reality for many families.
Dr. Ruth Nemzoff-a leading expert in family dynamics-empowers parents to create close relationships with their adult children, while respecting their independence. Based on personal stories as well as advice that she has accrued from years of coaching, this lively and readable book shows parents how to:
-communicate at long distances -discuss financial issues without using money as a form of control -speak up when disapproving of an adult child's partner or childrearing practices -handle adult children's career choices or other midlife changes -navigate an adult child's interreligious, interracial or same sex relationships
No other book treats the challenges of parent and adult offspring relationships as part and parcel of a healthy family dynamic. This practical lessons of Don't Bite Your Tongue will help parents play a vital and positive role in their children's lives.
"A very wise book. It not only takes into account the perspectives of parents and adult children but helps us to understand how changes in society influence these perspectives. Its non-judgmental framework and helpful questions should foster important cross-generational dialogue."
Rhoda Unger, author of Women and Gender: A Feminist Perspective
"Although tons of parenting books line the shelves of bookstores, very little exists to help parents of 20, 30 and 40 somethings. Ruth Nemzoff has written a wise and readable book that covers most of the universal developmental issued faced by today's parents of adult children. She encourages both generations to reflect on our inevitable differences, and advises us on how to speak respectfully about them. If her advice is followed, family relationships will be strengthened, improving life for all involved, including the following generations of children."
Linda A. Braun, former director of Families First Parenting Programs
