Hots for Scots

Laird Oliphant's sons have no choice but to get married. Without an heir, the laird has gathered his sons - his six illegitimate sons, all born in the same year - and declared whoever presents him with a grandson first will become the next Highland Laird. Reactions are...mixed. But to Finn Oliphant, this is exactly the news he's been hoping for. You see, Finn has already chosen his future wife: the vivacious and intelligent Fiona MacIan, whom he fell in love with the previous year. He knows she's in love with him as well, so this whole "marriage ultimatum" thing should be easy-peasy. He'll simply invite Fiona to Oliphant Castle to sign all the betrothal contracts and... Bam! Done! They can get on with the baby-making! Except... It's not that Fiona is getting cold feet, exactly. She's fairly certain she loves Finn. Mostly. Well, very likely, at least. But she's never been the most self-confident woman, especially compared to her sister - her identical twin sister - whom Finn happens to mistake for Fiona upon their arrival at his keep, which is super-awkward all around. The idea of marrying Finn makes her feel all warm and giddy - hopefully that's just lust, not the ague - but how can she be certain he truly wants her, and not just any woman? It's hard enough to be certain of anything on Oliphant land, especially with Finn's mad Aunt Agatha spreading rumors, five potential brothers-in-law offering terrible advice, and a mysterious ghostly drummer keeping the entire keep awake at all hours. And mayhap Finn should've mentioned his identical twin brother as well? That information likely would have saved everyone a lot of headache...and a lot of heartbreak. Finn and Fiona have plenty to learn about themselves, and one another, before they can be certain this marriage is a good idea. But unfortunately, they're running out of time. Dun-dun-duuuuuuuun! Warning: This comedy of errors is not for anyone who can't handle the following: plenty of naughty scenes, more than a few anachronistic jokes, and an embarrassing number of mistaken-identity gags. Only pick up this book if you have a sense of humor. You've been warned.

Rocque Oliphant has simple wants: a fine sword at his hip, a good meal in his belly, and a lusty wench by his side. His position as the Oliphant Commander, leader of men, ensures the first, and his long-term affair with Merewyn, the clan healer, ensures the second and third. She brings him joy - and pleasure - in a way he once only dreamed of! Aye, things are going well in his life... At least they were, right up until his father - the laird - demanded he marry and start producing grandsons. If Rocque wants to beat his brothers at a chance for the lairdship, he needs to find a willing woman to bear his sons - and fast! But Merewyn, the stubborn lass, refuses to marry him and won't tell him why. Rocque can't imagine spending his life with anyone else! So, if he can't marry another lass, and the one he wants won't marry him, what chance does he have to secure the title of the new laird? As the Oliphant healer, Merewyn knows her value to the clan. She is also quite aware she doesn't need to marry... and the only way she will, is for love. And Rocque, stubborn idiot that he is, won't tell her his true feelings. Can she be blamed for saying nay to his proposal? But now she's running out of time and knows she has no choice but to tell him the truth, or set him free, because in a few months, everyone in the clan will know her secret! Rocque might have more brawn than brains, but he's smart enough to know he can't lose Merewyn. But is he prepared for the battle it's going to take to prove that to her? Warning: This story contains naughty bits. Lots of them. Ridiculous amounts. Also contains characters and conversations which are funny enough to make you spit out your tea. For the sake of your devices, do not drink while listening to this audiobook. That is all, you may now carry on.

Malcolm Oliphant is, beyond a doubt, the brains of the family. Since his father, the laird, announced whichever brother could marry and produce a son first would become the heir, Malcolm's brothers have been running around, falling in love willy-nilly, without using their brains at all. But not Malcolm, oh no. He plans to do this intelligently. He'll find a widow with a son or two, thus proving her ability to bear male offspring, and explain to her they will be married. See? Simple. No need to bring emotions into it. But when he finally meets the perfect woman for his plan, there's no logical explanation for the way his heart keeps getting involved. It would be so much simpler if the stupid organ would just simmer down, but have you ever tried explaining things to a hunk of meat, whose sole purpose is moving blood around? Impossible! Besides, when Evelinde looks at him, he feels like... a hero. Evelinde Oliphant's situation is getting desperate. Since her first husband's death, she and her two sons are living alone in what could charitably be called the middle-of-bloody-nowhere, without any real means of support. When a scholarly warrior - one who makes her heart pound with desire - saves her life, how can she not think of him as her very own savior? Falling in love - and into Malcolm's arms - is the easy part. But what will happen when she learns who he really is and why he really married her?

Alistair Oliphant has devoted his entire life to his clan's well-being. As one of the laird's bastard sons, he's determined to prove his worth by managing the Oliphants' correspondence, alliances, land stewardship, trading schedules, and about a million other-boring-aspects of keeping a busy Highland clan going. When his father declares whichever of his sons marries and produces a son first will become the next laird, Alistair figures his destiny has finally arrived. The only problem is...he just doesn't have the time to find a wife. Luckily, he doesn't have to, because right under his oblivious nose is a woman who is ready and willing, and just waiting to hit him over the head with her long-time crush. Lara Oliphant has grown up with the Oliphant bastards, but as their best friend's younger sister, none of them have given her a second look. Which is a shame, because she's done quite a lot of looking herself when it came to Alistair. And as a result of Lara's embarrassingly voyeuristic lifestyle, she's decided she's the only one who can set the poor man straight. Or rather...not straight. If Alistair got any straighter, she could shove a wick up his rear and call him a candle. What he needs is someone to show him how to bend, how to relax...how to have a little fun. And Lara is just the woman to do it. Assuming she can convince him to see her as a woman, that is! Warning: Full of naughty shenanigans and ridiculous jokes, and more than a few eye-rollingly bad puns. Come for the spicy bits, stay for the humor. Welcome to another installment of the hilarious Hots for Scots series!

Six brothers were single at the beginning of this mess, but now there's only one man left standing... Kiergan Oliphant considers himself the only sane one in his family; what other explanation could there be for why all five of his brothers have fallen in love and gotten married, just because their father made a stupid ultimatum? Sure, the laird declared whichever son married and produced a son first would become his heir, but is that really any reason for a man to give up his freedom? Because if there's one thing Kiergan likes, it's his freedom. And women. And those little berry tart things the cook makes. And the freedom to do things with women. So...four? Aye, four things he likes. Which is good because there isn't much else he's good at. His brothers all have their talents and responsibilities, while Kiergan has been content to be relegated to the role of the family rake. He has no desire to be the next laird, because it would not only mean less time for pleasure, but it would also mean being saddled with a wife. Nae thank ye! But of course, his father has other plans. Enter the MacKinnon sisters: Davina is beautiful, desirable, and would make a brilliant alliance for the Oliphant Clan, while Katlyn is...none of those things. So of course, tis Katlyn who intrigues Kiergan the most, with her strange eyes and even stranger ideas. Katlyn MacKinnon knows exactly who she is, and she knows her worth as well. Upon her birth, the devil himself marked her by giving her eyes of two different colors. Her curse means she'll never marry or secure any alliances, but that doesn't mean she can't have a little fun... So, what happens when these two independent hearts get caught in bed together? Hilarious shenanigans ensue, of course! Warning: This book contains crude jokes, lewd puns, and more than a little slapstick. Get ready to laugh out loud in this side-splitting adventure, full of secret passages, revolving bookshelves, a damned annoying ghost, and one stubborn rake!

Book 1: Laird Oliphant's sons have no choice but to get married. Without an heir, the laird has gathered his sons--his six illegitimate sons, all born in the same year--and declared whoever presents him with a grandson first, will become the next Highland Laird. Reactions are...mixed. But to Finn Oliphant, this is exactly the news he's been hoping for. You see, Finn has already chosen his future wife: the vivacious and intelligent Fiona MacIan, whom he fell in love with the previous year.It's not that Fiona is getting cold feet, exactly. Book 2: Duncan Oliphant's father has insisted he--and all of his brothers--marry and start producing grandsons...like, yesterday. And Dunc is having none of it. But he is the laird's son and he knows he has a duty to do; one he's happy to postpone, as he takes one more commission, which has him traveling across the Highlands, gold in hand. Even worse if it's not a man at all, but a highwaywoman. What in the world is Skye MacIan doing, robbing unsuspecting travelers? The only way to discover the truth--and get back his gold--is to kidnap the highwaywoman and offer a trade. Book 3: Rocque Oliphant has simple wants: a fine sword at his hip, a good meal in his belly, and a lusty wench by his side. If Rocque wants to beat his brothers at a chance for the lairdship, he needs to find a willing woman to bear his sons--and fast! But Merewyn, the stubborn lass, refuses to marry him and won't tell him why. Rocque can't imagine spending his life with anyone else! Book 4: Malcolm Oliphant is, beyond a doubt, the brains of the family. Since his father, the laird, announced whichever brother could marry and produce a son first would become the heir, Malcolm's brothers have been running around, falling in love willy-nilly, without using their brains at all. He plans to find a widow with a son or two, thus proving her ability to bear male offspring, and explain to her they will be married. See? Simple. No need to bring emotions into it.